Getting others to accept your feedback is a daunting task. Many managers resort to techniques like “praise sandwich” when it comes to giving feedback and end up building a culture of confusion and self-delusion. But small adjustment in your approach can produce a world of difference in your message. Following a partnership model, that distributes the power and focuses on asking questions, not giving orders, will make you enjoy better relationship with team and will change the trajectory of feedback conversations.
It can be best explained using the example of “window gazing” and “mirror holding.”
Ask two persons gazing out the same window to describe what they see, and you’re likely to get two perspectives that are different but remain equally valid. Similarly, the imbalance of power allows only manager’s view to prevail. It can be biased as managers tend to overlook details related to an employee’s work.
That changes with “mirror holding”. Instead of telling their employees what to see, managers guide them where to look and engage employees in thoughtful conversation about their strengths, future goals, and how to bring those elements closer in line.
By following this approach, feedback conversations will prove to be fruitful and bring joy instead of fear.
